Wednesday, May 4, 2016

fairytale time : little girl

Sometime it made me scare…

Cause sometime when i write..i think i write about me..but actually that writing is about someone else. -___-!! It’s so scary.  You know, like computer process electricity, and then you see all the word, picture on screen, (it’s just only 01 000 1111 0000, but computer read it for you, so you might understand it, yup ofc with help of your brain). I (computer) kind of describe that unknown feeling from someone(electricity) into word (screen) and you read (using you brain).

(i think it is me (my feeling) huhuhu… my friend said, i am you, you am i..hurmmm… ya it sound logic now ahahaha)

And sometime i got so angry about something…but it’s not me who was angry, cause i;m not in the mood to get angry with anything, i’m so lazy and tired, and have no reason to get angry.  But people around me, they’re angry about something/someone, even  they don’t say anything, and when i be there, i could feel it. So i went into my room, alone, calm myself down, or maybe cry, and cool myself from anger. And tomorrow/later, i got the answer…yup they’re angry with someone and they feel annoyed. 

Well..sometime maybe i wasn’t right…but most of the feeling is so true…ya it’s the worst, when i can’t find where that force/source is coming from, from who, and why… sometime, i just feel heat…same with my friend (light friend-white path). I just said 

“ do you feel it…in this hall?”
“ya…” and smile…

p/s: ya everytime..when we have class in that hall with hundred student..we feel it…hurrmmm who is she and he?..and we just ignore it. it’s so relief to have friend with same frequency, cause they understand what is happening..and not saying it’s just nonsense ridiculous, crazy. Cause that thing is happening to them too.

And sometime..i’m sweating..and sometime i have to be away from that people, even though they’re nice, and want to be my friend…but our meeting, it’s just…you don’t know…heat. I’m not that strong..still weak. It’s  uncomfortable for me… Ya it’s not right to leave people. But i have to think about me.

See it’s so terrible to be sensitive with energy. You could feel anything, just by reading word/writing, meet people, when listening to song, see someone. Their aura. If someone full with love, just look at them, it make you feel ease at heart, you just like them with no reason, even that is your first time meet them, they have healing energy. Just by reading their writing also give positive impact to you. Even if people you met have terrible aura, that make you feel  hate at him/her for no reason, you have to control it, don’t hurt them. Our motto of life, if they don’t do us any harm, we won’t harm them. Ya everyone is struggling in this world, we don’t know what happen to them, until they have such ugly aura…maybe if you’re at their place you’ll understand.

p/s: but still…if they don’t disturb our peace ..we won’t disturb them..if they want to be our friend. Please control that ugly behavior! Cause even though… fish swimming  and live in ocean, it doesn’t let salt change it structure ( i mean taste). Only when it dead, human put salt in or on it, it taste salty. It is your choice, dear ugly aura! ^^…dear lovely aura, don’t feel sad if you have to disappoint some people, i know you’re crying when you have to angry or leave people, but toxic people will harm you, and you’re not strong enough/yet to handle such monster, just take a good care of yourself hurmmm… it’s not your responsibility. Just don’t give up in your life, when you’re strong enough, come and play the game of life to the fullest.
Or sometime it’s kind of de ja vu… example… i said to one friend of me, if someone slap you one, slap them back one…and within an hour…that situation happen. And i was like, wow… Matrix meet you dear. Ya someone in higher position got free slap from someone, never in history it happen just like that. And sometime i told mom, this and that…mom said i made cartoon story, and when it happened, me myself got so shocked…she was shocked she don’t want to listen to my cartoon story anymore.

My friend said to me (my dark friend) it is because of our frequency just nearly the same that is why we met.

And that kitty, it still want to be near me…but it don’t get too close like it done before, it just wait front of my door, and only when i call it, it’ll come to me. I give it food, i like to see it eat food. Thank you kitty, cause you understand, i don’t hate you, but sometime i just feel stress. Ya it play with bell bell, muffin just too old to play with lizard, it just look at bell2 play with lizard, and then he off to sleep.ahahahaha…

p/s: hurmmmm..just take anything that you understand..and leave what you don’t. Cause me myself, still discover about human, about myself. I write just because, i try to understand myself. I just want to be myself, i don’t want to be fake just to impress people. I don’t want to live in such cage. Perfect…i’m not perfect. Just look at my grammar. It will take a lot of time. I want to know everything…and i want to feel happy with knowledge that i gain. I just don’t get it, why some people don’t want to use their brain to the fullest…why they waste it!!

And i’ll give all of me just for knowledge…ya in this life…in this existence. I’ll try to help fix this earth, help many people as i can. Friendship…for me, friendship is about giving… I just want to give, i don’t want to receive anything. I just want to give..and give. And make them smile. This is how i feel about friendship. And i still too weak to do that, just doing it little by little. Mom is a very good example, she give and give, to all people that she meet.

Friend even if i leave you, i want you to understand about friendship and be nice to people around you, and be friend with a lot of people. Be strong! There is already so much hatred in this world, i want all my friend to have good energy, so the world will be balance back…too much negative energy isn’t good for earth. It’ll ruin.

Hurmmm when i getting angry..please just ignore it..sometime i just crazy…i’m not really serious…just playing. After angry, i could laugh back like crazy… in second angry, just a few minute later…i laugh… Ya see…i’m not really serious. My nature… i love to love people and everything, even if they’re bad to me..i couldn’t help but to love them, isn’t it crazy? I always see something in them, that make me adore them so much! Ya that is the nature of that tiny little girl, she got angry when people hit her,(ofc she hit them back) but after that fight, she ignore it, and be friend with them back.  That is why i’m so popular in my childhood, i don’t  know how to hate people for a very long time. I love to be with my friend. I just give them the taste of their own medicine… if they yell, i yell at them back. But after that we’re friend.. Crazy childhood -____-!!!. Maybe children just don’t want to lose friend..

HURMMM…and i experience a lot of thing…until that lil girl lost herself…i keep seeing her smile at me, i love her so much…i wish you’re never grow up, sweet little girl. Gonna hug her…i love her sooo much.. ahahahah long essay

When you love too much it is hard for you to get angry at people. But when you do get angry at them, it’ll give a big impact like nuclear.  So don’t make people of love angry at you…cause it will ruin your life, your life will be miserable. Until you learn the lesson. Their word is like a curse. God give to them such ability cause they will not easily cursing people for revenge, cause they love too much, and will risk their life for you, but you betray them again and again.

they use it when they reach their limit! ,maybe they just said.. “it’s really hurt” then your world will turn to be hell yaaa. Maybe because God love them so much…you hurt God’s beloved servant..wrong people huhuhuhu final bomb..boom.. scary story

p/s: don’t worry…i’m really bad..i don’t have that kind of ability, if you hurt me..i’ll just hurt you back using my hand, if you use hand. If you use word, i use word back. And then i’ll feel okay. Yup…in my childhood, that boy made me feel soooooo sad. Back at home i cried, and told to god…he do this and that…and tomorrow that boy suddenly faint front of me. That is not my fault -____-!!!. Maybe that girl, my old self was people of love. So God listen to her, her wish always come true, fast. I don’t wish for him to die, i just said “if he it to me” and then i cried…when he fainted..i know he lied..felt a lil bit relieved. So when he disturb my friend…i just told her…don’t worry. He is totally lying, just ignore him.

scary little girl…i wish i could meet her back. I wonder why  she have a very lovely dovey heart. I wrote about my old self, but i feel like reading someone else story. Cause she and me now, like two different people..contrast! ahahaha…it feel like writing about dead person. She already died. ^^

dear little girl, could you teach this grown up version of you to be like you..Can we be friend?? hug
i miss her(cry)

p/s: ok enough…

p/s: see...Allah is enough to protect us from any harm...but..people nowadays...
they don't believe god, and they make god as...what is wrong with their faith....
even if they believe in god...they are weak in their faith ...
if you have faith in him...your world wouldn't involve in war...and nothing can hurt you
don't cry and ask human to help you! human is not god...they;re weak -_____-!!!
seek protection from God..then he will protect you...

hurmmm..but they don't even know what is God
they don't even know who they really are
they're like robot

pawn...let them die!

i gone crazy again haishhhhhhhh arggghhhhh
haipp..demon..don't make me be evil heheh3

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